The Most Awkward And Absurd Car Names In Automotive History
Car names are quite important — they are meant to inspire certain feelings whether it's power and aggression, futuristic, or sleek and elegant. A lot of thought goes into car names — well, at least there should be a lot of thought. The following car models, however, may not have had that same care put into the naming process and it shows.
We've put together a list of car names that just don't sit well with most people. Not only do these names not successfully convey what the vehicle's vibe is, but they instead make car owners extremely uncomfortable or unable to stop laughing. From awkward innuendos to raunchy visuals, these car names feel like they would be found scrawled on the stalls of a middle school bathroom rather than uttered at a dealership. In some cases, the name even caused the car to lose sales. Check out these unsettling car names and try to make sense of it all.
Ford Probe
It's been said that part of the reason the Ford Probe failed was due to its name. Inspired by Mazda's technology, this 90s coupe had impressive handling and performance that still excites some Ford fans to this day. Unfortunately, the Ford Probe was discontinued due to poor sales – and some believe the name was a big part of the problem.
Named after a series of Ford-designed concept cars from the 80s, the Probe name was especially shocking in Europe and publications immediately drew comparisons to sex toys and it became the butt of many jokes in pop culture. Whether the word "probe" sounded overly sexual or like a disturbing alien experiment, the name clearly was not a hit. After just four years, the car stopped production in Europe. Ford Europe now runs names by a public panel and has car enthusiasts vote in polls for names to avoid further blunders.
Great Wall Wingle
The Great Wall Wingle is another suggestive and uncomfortable name that just doesn't create pleasant thoughts. While cars often have names meant to evoke feelings of power, excitement, and performance, it might be unclear to some what this name is supposed to make you feel aside from disturbed. This name, however, is more forgivable than the Probe since it's largely just due to translation issues.
"Wingle" is an English translation of the Chinese word for "horse." So in actuality, this name isn't any different from the Mustang. Of course, "wingle" doesn't give off that same vision of aggression and freedom in most countries, which is why the name has been changed. In the United Kingdom, the Wingle goes by the Great Wall Steed, which makes a lot more sense for a compact, chunky pickup truck. Unfortunately, the Wingle isn't for sale in the US or we'd love to see what name it would get in the states.
Great Wall Motor is just bad at creating names it seems — the POER is another truck that was cursed with a name that apparently means "Powerful, Off-road, Enjoyable, and Reliable."
Studebaker Dictator
This is the definition of a name not aging well. The name was first used by Studebaker in 1927 as part of its model line named after government positions: the Dictator, the Commander, and the President. At the time, the Dictator was considered the bottom of the leadership ladder which is why it was moderately priced — and Studebaker explained that it would "dictate the standards" for moderately priced cars.
While the car was considered pretty good, the name was not a hit. Studebaker dropped the name in 1938 during a time when dictators were starting to violently take over Europe. Studebaker never admitted the specific reason but it seems like this was a pretty safe assumption. Still, a car that made Americans think of Adolph Hitler proved to be a terrible choice. While the name was changed to Director, it's hard to forget that Studebaker was using the term "dictator" during such a volatile time in world history. Once a prominent American car company, Studebaker is no more.
Daihatsu Naked
The Daihatsu Naked is a kei car that was first introduced at the Tokyo Motor Show in 1997. It's small and boxy with not a lot of power but fans of the car say it's extremely fun to drive. It's 1,785 pounds and has a pretty simplistic interior. While it's definitely seen as playful and curious by countries around the world, what's with the name?
There's no official word from Daihatsu on what the brand was thinking — do we truly want to know what thoughts they are having? Most believe it got its name due to the bare design, with exposed door hinges and a rugged, unfinished vibe. There's a rumor that there's also a Daihatsu Naked Owners Club and a Daihatsu: Naked Owners Club inspired by the car. The second group sounds especially upsetting if you're not looking to join a nudist club revolving around driving boxy cars around.
[Featured image by Tennen-Gas via Wikimedia Commons | Cropped and scaled | CC BY-SA 3.0]
Mazda Titan Dump
If you're heavy on bathroom humor, the Mazda Titan Dump is bound to make you laugh every time you hear it. That's not a bad thing but likely not what Mazda had in mind.
The Mazda Titan Dump is a commercial truck carries between 1.5 and 4.25 tons depending on the model, so it's actually pretty serious when it comes to capabilities. Unfortunately, its name didn't translate well in English. It's hard not to picture a nightmarish bowel movement in a public bathroom rather than a capable truck. Mazda may have realized this because it finally changed its name to the Isuzu Elf — but does that sound any better? Maybe it's not as dirty but it still doesn't bring to mind images of a strong and useful truck.
For now, the Mazda Titan Dump is still one of the most awkward and unfortunate car names in history.
[Featured image by Mj Bird via Wikimedia Commons | Cropped and scaled | CC BY-SA 3.0]